How to Cook Menudo
Oink! I’m back! After a long hiatus… I don’t know what hiatus means. So yeah, hiatus. Lovely word that. Hiatus. Moving on!
I believe the best pet a man can ever have is a Pig. Here are reasons why The Pig can be the bestest friend a man can ever have.
1. You can eat it. I would have said – “you can eat this bestfriend” but the thought suddenly gave me the urge to put on a bra so I digressed to – you can eat it. Tell me if you can do that with your dog.
2. When it gets big, you can ride on it. You would be lying if you tell me you haven’t fantasized piggybacking on a pig. Everyone had at least one “piggybacking” thought because if we didn’t, who would have thought of the word piggyback? And piggybacking on anything or anyone except on a pig seems not proper. It should be with a pig really.
3. If something stinks (that means you), you could always blame the pig for it. ‘Nuff said.
4. Pigs don’t bark.
5. Pigs can find Truffles and make you a millionaire.
6. When you need a heart transplant, that pig will save your life.
7. There is no pink dog or cat or rabbit or fish.
8. Pig’s milk tastes awesome.
9. Pigs look good in a tutu.
10. Imagine if the pig finally takes the throne as man’s best friend, when your wife calls you a pig, you know what the woman means.
Seriously, this article will tell that the most delicious beast can really be a man’s best friend – read this.
And this post that you are reading right now you pig lover you, will not only reinforce that article but will gloriously declare why a pig is your best friend… she will be there when you’re lonely, she will be there when you’re cold, she’s saying, I’ll be there to comfort you, Build my world with dreams around you, I’ll be there with a love so strong, I’ll be your strength, you know I’ll keep oinking ooooon. And she’s not Mariah Carey or Michael Jackson.
Menudo. That’s the name of the pork dish that we will make. And no it is not the Mexican Menudo stew that is from stomach walls. It’s not even the Latino Boy Band that your ugly sister offered her womanhood to. It is the Philippines’ sweet and savory tomato based stew Menudo. And yes, you’re ugly sister loves it too.
My goodness, I missed writing here that I haven’t even started doing the pig. I mean the recipe.
So what do we need? Here’s a picture:
If you can’t recognize any of those because you are too busy living without ever caring what fuels your life, those are:
Chickpeas for 1 1/2 cup
Sweet peas or baby green peas 1 cup
Carrots 1 1/2 cup
Potatoes 1 1/2 cup
Raisins 1/4 cup
Tomato Sauce 1 cup
Pork Stock 4 cups
and the photo-shy Pork which is almost 2 kilos. Here he is:
Not only that he is ready, tender and juicy, I have made pork stock out of his willing meat. If you don’t know how to make stock, click this. This whole slab of pork will still be sliced and diced to a size that is as big as your chickpeas. Not too small, not too big. So now that we have everything let’s start cooking.
1. Pork Menudo is one of the Cocidos that mother Spain has shared to the Philippines… so we will start this recipe with the usual saute of Onions, Garlic and Tomatoes. If you are confused with the ratio of our Spanish trio combo because this is the first time you have visited this site, click this to fatten your brain (follow the links and don’t stop reading). Lazy? I expected that. 3 cloves of garlic, 1 large Spanish onion and 2 large tomatoes go in the pot or deep wok for every kilo of meat – they will need to sweat in a saute before you put anything in. In this case, we have 2 kilos of meat. Do the math. Oh the potatoes will also go with them. I hate potatoes.
2. After the sweating is done, add everything including Tomato Sauce and let it simmer for a good 10 minutes. After 10 minutes you are actually done but keep in mind that Menudo is a sweet stew, so taste it before you serve it. Those who don’t taste what they are cooking should not be cooking in the first place. There are a lot of ways to sweeten your Menudo but the common way is to add more raisins. If you don’t like raisins, you can do with sugar, pineapple juice and pieces or even honey (if you put honey in your Menudo, you must, should, will and promise-to-death play this song). If you clicked on that and you just came back from youtube, I am pretty sure that you are now lovesick. Send me an email so I can help you mend that broken heart.
That was just 2 steps? It’s as easy as falling in love with Ricky Martin.
If you love pork or say pigs you will love this. Unless you don’t eat pork because you are restricted by your mental geography, this is one of the recipes that will let you finish 5 kilos of rice in one meal. And that is uncooked rice. You will love this. Your mother will love this. Your priest will love this. Even your pig will love this. Yes unfortunately, pigs eat pigs too. Lovely beasts aren’t they?
This is getting freaky.
I will leave you with this video which will make you want more of man’s best friend to be – The humble Pigaletow.
Just so you know, I am in no way related to this video and its grammatical subtitling hurdles. But I appreciate the lovely effort.
And I forgot the Menudo picture!!!!
I should be getting used to writing here again. Hia-oink-atus!