If you came from this article, good… if you didn’t, bad. Read that first please.

Did you already? Let’s go.

I want to be straightforward with this How to Cook Sinigang post because I am watching Jools Holland and the music is getting in the way of my writing. And I don’t have the luxury of watching TV neither letting you wait for the recipe. So, on to the ingredients:

1 kilo of any steak cut fish of your choice

1 the-largest-piece of spanish onion that you can find, 5 of the sweetest medium tomatoes, 6 vampire-killing garlic cloves – all chopped

1/4 cup of vegetable oil

2 medium sized Talong (eggplants), cut like retangles, the French call it Jardiniere

1 long and medium sized Labanos (Japanese Turnips), hmmm Jar-di-niere?

1 bunch of Mustard Greens or 1 Bunch of Water Spinach

1 tablespoon of Miso for  3 and a half cups of water

1 tablespoon and beyond of tamarind concetrate either powdered or syrup, if you can make it fresh from the fruit itself, you’re in heaven

1 tablespoon and beyond of fish sauce

Spring onions. Up to you how many

Let’s?

Get a deep pot. You cannot cook Sinigang in a flat pan.

Step 1 Do your sautee of onion, tomatoes and garlic. Drop them all at the same time in your pot. Saute in low heat and none of them should be browned. Let them give their juices for the dish until all of them has turned into a pulp.

Step 2 Add your 3 and a half cups of water in and dunk in your miso, and your eggplants as well. Crank the heat up and cover for the next 10 minutes or until boiling crazy.

Step 3 Your cue here is to see when your eggplants are cooked. If they are, turn the heat to medium and carefully test your broth. See if the Miso has amalgamated with the soup already. Test if it has made the broth salty. Does it need more salt? If it needs more, then start with 1 tablespoon of fish sauce. This step is to make sure that your broth tastes good. If it doens’t have a kick of miso, always add by a teaspoon and taste in 5 minute gaps. You need to wait for your Miso to germinate in your broth before you start adding more.

It’s your fault. The Jools Holland show has just finished.

Step 4 If your broth is perfect to your taste (and hopefully to the mouths your feeding it as well), add your fish in. Do not overcook your fish. That’s the reason why we tested and perfected the broth first so that we won’t overcook the fish. For an inch thick of steak, 10 minutes is more than enough. And once you dunk your fish in, be sure it’s in medium heat. Make sure it’s not boiling like everything wants to jump out of the pot. It should be boiling but softly. Cover for the next 8-10 minutes (if your fish is more than an inch thick).

Step 5 Get a fork and stick it in the fish near the bone, if you can move the flesh easily and it looks cook, it is. Dunk in your Labanos (Japanese Turnips) at Mustasa (Mustard Greens) or in my family’s case – Kangkong (Water Spinach). And this is also the time that you will add your acidic element which is usually a tamarind concentrate in powder or in syrup form. I use syrup or the liquid concentrate myself. Start with 1 tablespoon a then give it a taste. Some people like their Sinigang sour, some like it a bit sweet. Ah yes, you have to add at least a teaspoon of sugar in your Sinigang. It makes a big difference. So add your souring element little by little yes? And taste as you go along.

I think you’re done. Don’t forget to chop your spring onions and dunk it in the pot right after you take it off the heat. Tell me how your Sinigang cookfest went.

The TV is currently playing The Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. My daughter has taken reins. Well, it seems like I’ll have to wait for another week for Jools again. Happy cooking!

Yield 1 serving

Ingredients:

For the Seared Tuna

140 grams Tuna Loin

Salt and Black Pepper to taste

For the Balsamic Vinaigrette

50 mL Balsamic Vinegar

50 mL Extra Virgin Olive Oil

50 grams White Onion (small dice)

15 grams white sugar

For the Salad

1 whole Ripe Mango (diced)

30 grams Mixed Greens

1 pcs hard boiled egg (cut into quarters)

3 pcs Pitted Black Olives (sliced)

5 pcs Cherry Tomatoes (cut in half)

Procedure

To prepare seared tuna

Season the Tuna Loin with Salt and Black Pepper. On a very hot pan with a little olive oil, Sear the Tuna at 30 seconds per side until all sides are partially cooked. Set aside in the refrigerator for at least 5 minutes to rest. Slice the Tuna thinly and set aside.

To prepare balsamic vinaigrette

Mix the Onions, Balsamic Vinegar and Sugar until the Sugar is dissolved. Add the extra virgin Olive Oil gradually while continuously mixing. Set aside in the refrigerator to cool.

To assemble

On one side of the plate,  prepare the diced Mangoes and top it with the Seared Tuna.

On another side of the plate, add the mixed greens and top it with the Cherry Tomatoes, Olives and Hard Boiled Eggs. Drizzle the Salad with the Balsamic Vinaigrette.

Serve Cold.

Cheers to Chef Mike for riding along with our theme for this fortnight, History of Filipino Food, American Influence – Ziggy

I wanted to publish more easy-to-follow modern Filipino recipes to highlight new methods of preparing our favorite ingredients, I hope you like it

For the Sandwich

Ingredients

2  to 3 pcs. Bottled Tuyo

100 Grams Kesong Puti

2  to 3 pcs. Sun dried Tomato (Thinly Sliced)

Ciabatta/ Baguette  or any type of Wheat Bread

Procedure

to make the sandwich, cut the ciabatta bread in the middle all the way through.

arrange the tuyo, sun-dried tomatoes and sliced kesong puti on the first half of the bread. Top it with the other half and place it in a sandwich or panini grill just until the kesong puti is melted.

serve it with a slice of lemon, cassava chips and rock salt. Serve hot

note: any type of sandwich grill can be used for this recipe such as “flying saucer maker” or sandwich press. you can also place the assembled sandwich on a non-stick pan over low heat turning it over about a minute per side if sandwich grill is not available.

for the Cassava Chips

Ingredients

100 grams Cassava ( Kamoteng Kahoy)

Salt and Black Pepper to Taste

Procedure

peel and slice the cassava thinly and place it on iced water for about 5 minutes. Drain the water and pat dry the sliced cassava.

Deep fry the sliced cassava on vegetable or peanut oil until golden brown in color. Drain the excess oil with paper towels. Season with salt and pepper and serve hot.

note: cassava may be substituted with camote or regular potatoes.

Mga sangkap:

2 kutsarang mantika
1 kutsaritang tinadtad na bawang
1 sibuyas (pakwadradong hiwa)
3 kamatis (pakwadradong hiwa)
1/2 kilong liempo
4 kutsarang bagoong alamang
luya (pahabang hiwa)
10-12 pirasong siling haba (alisin ang mga buto)
½ tasang tubig
1 1/2 tasang kakang gata
paminta at asin (pangtimpla)

Paraan ng pagluto:

Hiwain ang baboy ng pahaba.

Initin ang mantika sa kawali/kaldero, kapag mainit na ang mantika ilagay ang baboy at igisa hanggang sa maging bahagyang luto na .

Idagdag at igisa ang bawang, sibuyas, kamatis, bagoong alamang, luya at ang sili. Igisang mabuti at haluin.

Idagdag ang tuibig, takpan at pakuluan ng hanggang 15 minuto. Kapag luto na ang karne at ang sili ay malambot na ilagay ang gata, lutuin ito sa katamtamang lakas ng apoy at haluin paminsan-minsan haggang ang gata ay maging malapot at lubos ng tuyo.

Timplahan ng paminta at asin ayon sa panglasa.

Kung gusto mo talaga ng nagbabagang anghang maari rin maglagay ng pinatuyong pulang sili.

What were you thinking? Of course I didn’t do it. I can’t even brave a winter morning without necessary heating devices attached to my skin. And you can’t even find a kangaroo in a chilly morning anyway. And yeah, I went to the nearest supermarket to buy free-range kangaroo meat. Running over kangaroos and koalas are condemned here in Australia.  Goodness. See above how cute that is? You killer. You heartless  slaughterer of Australia’s emblem!

I am doing this recipe since we are on the topic of “Filipinos eat everything”. Send a Filipino to any part of the world and good luck to your well-loved animals. We look at moving creatures as ingredients. So why not make a Kangaroo Adobo?

Kangaroo meat is very lean and better than beef or pork in terms of fat content. The iron content in Kangaroo meat is very high, I suggest you have some if you have iron deficiency. What does kangaroo meat taste like? The gaminess would be a little bit stronger than goat. If you try to just fry it, you better have a lot of resilience to anything gamy. Good luck.

That’s why I thought making Adobo would be perfect for Kangaroo meat. The use of vinegar in Adobo will mask the gaminess of the meat. Garlic, pepper and bay leaves are spices and herbs that go well with red meat. So here’s what I told myself:

Dear Ziggy,

1. Buy Kangaroo fillets instead of Kangaroo steak cuts because those fillets are thicker than steak cuts.

2. Cut the kangaroo into big bite size pieces.

3. Marinate half a kilo of Kangaroo meat (because in case no one will eat it, it’s not too much to finish) with:

half a cup of Datu Puti vinegar (because it is one of the strongest vinegars in the world, I don’t know what they put in there)

1/4 cup of soy sauce

3 cloves of chopped garlic

at least a tablespoon of ground pepper

2 large bay leaves

half a teaspoon of salt

1 teaspoon of pepper

4. Then leave it to marinate for at 12-24 hours

I actually marinated mine for almost a day.

Now this is what I did for my very first Kangaroo Adobo recipe:

1. I took off the meat from the marinade and let excess liquids drain back into the bowl of the marinade. Do not throw away the marinade for your unborn children’s sake.

2. I heated up a pan to medium heat and added oil that would just cover the entire base of the pan.

3. Fried the drained and dry Kangaroo meat in batches so as to avoid drowning the oil with the meat juices. Immediately after each side of the fillet turned brown I took them off the heat into a clean plate.

4. After I finished frying the fillets I poured the marinade into the pan and turned up the heat because I was gunning for a thick sauce.

5. Once the sauce thickened, I deposited all the seared Kangaroo meat back to the pan and then covered it for 5 minutes.

6. I added spring onions because it would cut through the salty-sourness of the Adobo as well as the gaminess of Skippy.

I loved it. My Australian tester loved it. My wife hated it and didn’t even dare try it. She hates me when I cook bunnies too. So here’s a question to Filipinos abroad, have you ever eaten any native animals from your neck of the woods? Tell us about it.

What do you need:

A pot

A ladle

Water (and no, your IQ just got higher actually)

2 tablespoons of oil

3 cloves of garlic, 1 large Spanish onion and 2 medium sized sweet-and-not-sour tomatoes

A kilo of beef chunks or cubes, preferably any cut between the cow’s legs and neck

1 large potato

1 medium-sized carrot

1 large bell pepper or capsicum

1/4 cup peas, either in cans or in plastic but preferably baby peas

Half a can or 175ml tomato sauce, click this on how to make one if you can already be bothered

Thickener – Cooked and mashed chicken liver or liver spread or peanut butter or ground skyflakes or roughly grated cheese to thicken the sauce

1 long and firm chili or cayenne pepper

2 pieces of bay leaves

Sugar, salt and ground pepper

What to do:

1. Put the pot in the stove in medium heat. And wait for it to get hot before you put your oil in. Don’t argue, just follow what I say because Tita Nora told me so.

2. As soon as the oil is hot but not smoking hot, put the garlic and onions in. Let it sweat. Don’t wait for it to turn brown or you’ll ruin the dish. After a couple of minutes or so, dunk in the tomatoes and let it turn into a pulp. It will take around another 3 to 5 minutes.

3. Get the beef in the pot quick! Stir, stir, stir. Practice the juggling technique. The one where you toss the ingredients and they happily jump in a circular motion? At least, if you are an expert on that you will look like you can actually cook.

4. When all the beef has spots of brown on them then let the water flow. The water should be just below the level of all your ingredients. Cover the pot until it boils. Once it boils, add your tomato sauce and lower the heat to the lowest possible. Now this part can go a bit long maybe until an hour depending on the cut of beef you chose but your headstrong aim is to make the beef tender. If you choose tenderloin, it will be much quicker and easier for you. So taste, test and see if your beef is soft. Hmmm… yeah you should always have your beef soft.

5. Once your (here we go again) beef is soft, add your potatoes and let it cook until the potatoes soften and then add your carrots.

6. After the carrots are half-cooked, add your thickener and adjust. If it’s too thick, add more water. If it’s too light, add more darkness. Add sugar, salt and pepper to taste. And let that thickener meld with the sauce for at least 5 minutes. Make sure it is not too thick or you’ll make a bread on the bottom of your pot.

7. Drop your chili pepper, bell peppers, bay leaves and peas and cover for another 5-10 minutes and the rest lies on your salivating orifice.

That is your quick and easy Kaldereta recipe.

I am now bracing myself with your invisible comments. Say hi or something. Let me know that you exist.

If you want an intensive and extensive process on How to Cook Kaldereta, click this

Or click this to go back to the beginning of this Caldereta Series

It is the 24th and all over the world Filipinos, big or small, brown, yellow, black or white are jumping like monkeys because we actually celebrate our Christmas after the clock strikes 12 on the morning of the 25th. So let’s start cooking.

I have 3 Christmas (or New Year, whichever night you would likely to mess up) recipes for you. Let’s start with a starter, a main and a dessert.

Buttered Prawns

1. Get some prawns

2. Marinate it in Mountain Dew, Lift or any lime drink (ah, ah, ah, don’t you ever argue) or some homemade lemonade, the  level of the fizzy drink should be the same as the amount of your prawns. At least 2 hours in there.

3. Chop some garlic and brown it in the wok with a generous, that means more than 2 tablespoons, amount of butter. Take the garlic off and set it aside.

4. No more garlic in the wok? Pour 1 cup of your softdrink marinade. Turn the heat up and watch it closely until it gets thick.

5. Once it gets thick, give it a name. Like some French Sauce name or name it after your pet. Then dunk the prawns in. And cover it. Make sure that you don’t overcook your prawns. 5 minutes is good for cooking a kilo of prawns. Or else you will kill them. They will turn out dry. You know you have overcooked them when shells look dry and the prawn has shrunk. Intiendes?

6. Take them off the heat, onto the serving plate and sprinkle your browned garlic.

Homemade Leg of Pork Ham

This is not your commercial months-old ham so don’t expect to hear bells tolling when you cut through it later. But this tastes so good that your family will love you and won’t lock you in the basement anymore. You need 7 hours for this. You can start at 3 pm and by 12AM, 25th of December, you will have ham on your Christmas table. Let’s go.

1. Get a Leg of Pork or if you don’t know how to spot them, ask your butcher what cut is used to make Christmas ham (he will probably think you are an idiot because it’s just hours away before Christmas and you can’t make a ham in 1 day). Ask him to debone it and tie for you. He will do that.

2. Let’s defy the butcher’s discriminating thoughts. Get a can of fruit. Any combination will do as long as it has juice in it and or syrup. Get some apples, onions, garlic, and cloves.

3.  Cure it quickly. Cover it with a lot of salt and sugar. And I mean a lot. Wrap it in cling film and store it in the fridge. Two hours there.

4. After 2 hours. Take it off and wash it. You cured it to make the skin tougher when you boil it later for 4 hours. If you don’t want to go with the curing process, get a pickled pork. Dunk it in the pot and add all your fruits in can with it, garlic and onions. 1 whole onion for each kilo and half a garlic head for each kilo. Add a lot of  whole black peppercorns. Simmer it low heat for 4 hours.

5. That’s cooked. All you have to do is glaze it. Put it in the oven in 200 deg cel. And baste it with your Christmas juice from time to time. Once it has turned Christmas-ish red, take it off, pour some maple syrup on it, score the skin and decorate. Done Amigo.

Macaroni Pasta

1. Pasta. Do the al-dente for the macaroni. We will assume that you are at least doing a kilo of this.

2. Dressing. While you are waiting for that, mix 2 cups of mayonnaise, 2 tablespoons of sugar, a little bit of  chopped shallots or red onions if you don’t have any and salt, 2 tablespoon of pickle relish, 2 tablespoons of raisins, 1 can of crushed pineapple chunks and Rudolph’s red nose. Let this sucker sit and wait.

3. Meat. Cook some chicken breasts. Half a kilo of it in the pot, with water, 1 onion, salt and sugar. No garlic please. this is a dessert for crying out loud. After they’re cooked, which takes about 20 minutes in the pot, peel thin strands off of it until you can peel no more.

4. Mix the dressing, pasta and meat in a huge thingy-thingy and stick in the fridge.

My goodness you are done sir!

How was it for a quick and easy Christmas or New year recipe? You can do it. Multi-task.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from Myfilipinokitchen!!!!!

I believe the best pet a man can ever have is a Pig. Here are reasons why The Pig can be the bestest friend a man can ever have.

1. You can eat it. I would have said – “you can eat this bestfriend” but the thought suddenly gave me the urge to put on a bra so I digressed to – you can eat it. Tell me if you can do that with your dog.

2. When it gets big, you can ride on it. You would be lying if you tell me you haven’t fantasized piggybacking on a pig. Everyone had at least one “piggybacking” thought because if we didn’t, who would have thought of the word piggyback? And piggybacking on anything or anyone except on a pig seems not proper. It should be with a pig really.

3. If something stinks (that means you), you could always blame the pig for it. ‘Nuff said.

4. Pigs don’t bark.

5. Pigs can find Truffles and make you a millionaire.

6. When you need a heart transplant, that pig will save your life.

7. There is no pink dog or cat or rabbit or fish.

8. Pig’s milk tastes awesome.

9. Pigs look good in a tutu.

10. Imagine if the pig finally takes the throne as man’s best friend, when your wife calls you a pig, you know what the woman means.

Seriously, this article will tell that the most delicious beast can really be a man’s best friend – read this.

And this post that you are reading right now you pig lover you, will not only reinforce that article but will gloriously declare why a pig is your best friend… she will be there when you’re lonely, she will be there when you’re cold, she’s saying, I’ll be there to comfort you, Build my world with dreams around you, I’ll be there with a love so strong, I’ll be your strength, you know I’ll keep oinking ooooon. And she’s not Mariah Carey or Michael Jackson.

Menudo. That’s the name of the pork dish that we will make. And no it is not the Mexican Menudo stew that is from stomach walls. It’s not even the Latino Boy Band that your ugly sister offered her womanhood to. It is the Philippines’ sweet and savory tomato based stew Menudo. And yes, you’re ugly sister loves it too.

My goodness, I missed writing here that I haven’t even started doing the pig. I mean the recipe.

So what do we need? Here’s a picture:

If you can’t recognize any of those because you are too busy living without ever caring what fuels your life, those are:

Chickpeas for 1 1/2 cup

Sweet peas or baby green peas 1 cup

Carrots 1 1/2 cup

Potatoes 1 1/2 cup

Raisins 1/4 cup

Tomato Sauce 1 cup

Pork Stock 4 cups

and the photo-shy Pork which is almost 2 kilos. Here he is:

Not only that he is ready, tender and juicy, I have made pork stock out of his willing meat. If you don’t know how to make stock, click this. This whole slab of pork will still be sliced and diced to a size that is as big as your chickpeas. Not too small, not too big. So now that we have everything let’s start cooking.

1. Pork Menudo is one of the Cocidos that mother Spain has shared to the Philippines… so we will start this recipe with the usual saute of Onions, Garlic and Tomatoes. If you are confused with the ratio of our Spanish trio combo because this is the first time you have visited this site, click this to fatten your brain (follow the links and don’t stop reading). Lazy? I expected that. 3 cloves of garlic, 1 large Spanish onion and 2 large tomatoes go in the pot or deep wok for every kilo of  meat – they will need to sweat in a saute before you put anything in. In this case, we have 2 kilos of meat. Do the math. Oh the potatoes will also go with them. I hate potatoes.

2. After the sweating is done, add everything including Tomato Sauce and let it simmer for a good 10 minutes. After 10 minutes you are actually done but keep in mind that Menudo is a sweet stew, so taste it before you serve it. Those who don’t taste what they are cooking should not be cooking in the first place. There are a lot of ways to sweeten your Menudo but the common way is to add more raisins. If you don’t like raisins, you can do with sugar, pineapple juice and pieces or even honey (if you put honey in your Menudo, you must, should, will and promise-to-death play this song). If you clicked on that and you just came back from youtube, I am pretty sure that you are now lovesick. Send me an email so I can help you mend that broken heart.

That was just 2 steps? It’s as easy as falling in love with Ricky Martin.

If you love pork or say pigs you will love this. Unless you don’t eat pork because you are restricted by your mental geography, this is one of the recipes that will let you finish 5 kilos of rice in one meal. And that is uncooked rice. You will love this. Your mother will love this. Your priest will love this. Even your pig will love this. Yes unfortunately, pigs eat pigs too. Lovely beasts aren’t they?

This is getting freaky.

I will leave you with this video which will make you want more of man’s best friend to be – The humble Pigaletow.

Just so you know, I am in no way related to this video and its grammatical subtitling hurdles. But I appreciate the lovely effort.

And I forgot the Menudo picture!!!!

I should be getting used to writing here again. Hia-oink-atus!

For those who want to learn another Filipino tomato based stew, click here for How to Cook Afritada

For those who want to learn yet another Filipino tomato based stew, click here for How to Cook Mechado

Ok, this may not be quick but it’s easy as pie.

Do this quick and easy Mechado recipe this coming weekend when you are not doing anything because this may take up to 5 hours of your nothing-to-do weekend schedule.

As we have discussed previously here, when you cook Mechado there should be a thick layer of fat in the middle of your meat. It may be a thick layer of pork fat (preferebly bacon) or in this Juan Tamad recipe’s case, a beef cut that has a thick layer of fat in the middle. No need to insert a thick tube of pork fat or rolling pork fat with your beef cuts.  Getting a beef cut that has the thickest settlement of fat in it will do this recipe. And that part is the rib of the cow. The white people say Rib Eye Steak, the brown people just say Ribs. This is what it looks like:

See the fat in the middle? That is our excuse for being lazy and not folding in that pork fat for our quick and easy Mechado recipe.

As I have also mentioned before, your Mechado depends on you. Some Mechado recipes put potatoes, carrots and bell peppers. Whoever’s spirit possesses you at the time you make your Mechado recipe will tell if your pot needs vegetables or not.

Now this coming Saturday, my spirit will possess your mortal body and I will make a Mechado recipe using your body as a host. I will dominate you. If you are female, you are in big trouble. I’m sorry there is no turning back now. The moment you read the first sentence of this post, your body, which I call my vessel, is doomed (or blessed) to be my host this Saturday. So this is what I’ll do.

9AM

I won’t let your body get up from bed yet. I’ll let you vegetate there or be mutilated by your kids. If you have a pet and it’s licking you on the lips, enjoy it for the next hour.

10AM

I decide to let you get up. You can still feel that you are yourself. But you will lose control of just about everything because you are – out on a limb. You can just feel… occupied. I will let you go to the Market and get  a kilo of that rib cut. While on the market, I will let you shout incessantly for no reason and with no sense since it’s not me anyway.

11AM

We, that means, your body and my body-possessing spirit, are now at home and we will marinate the beef. So I will need, a lemon, 2 pieces of bay leaves, salt and pepper. Now since I just possessed you today, I don’t know where your cupboard or pantry is. So I will be wandering in your kitchen for a decent amount of time. If I get frustrated, I will try to do a backflip. I mean I will try if your body can do a backflip. That marinade will have to sit for the next 3 hours. Now, I have nothing to do for the next two hours and I am alone with your body… what to do, what to do.

2PM

What happened to you for the last 2 hours will be a mystery come this weekend. Now we chop 1 whole onion and saute it in a pot. Then we get our marinated beef cuts and dunk them in the pot and fry them with our onions. Once the onions brown (and not burnt), we go to your freezer and check if you have stock in there. You should have stock in there because I told you to make stock in this post. If you don’t have beef stock in there, I will make a beef stock this Saturday and possess you again the next Saturday because this quick and easy Mechado recipe is worthless without beef stock. But for your sake, let’s just say you have beef stock. We get 2 cups of beef stock and put it inside our pot. Now for each 2 cups of our beef stock we’ll also pour in a cup of tomato sauce. Now if you don’t have tomato sauce in your little cabinet of ingredients either, click this, because it’ll tell you how to make your own homemade tomato sauce. Let’s add 1/3 cup of soy sauce, a teaspoon of salt and 2 teaspoons of ground pepper. Let our beautiful coordination sit in the pot in low heat for the next 2-3 hours or until half of the liquid has been reduced. The more reduction the better the taste. Now as far as i’m concerned this dish is done.

Ehem.

The next 3 hours of me controlling your body will start with you in front of the mirror. I will look at you look at me because it’s actually me letting you look at yourself. And I’ll let you say, so… “what to do, what to do for the next 3 hours?”

5PM

What in the world happened? Who knows.

Here’s is how to cook Mechado if you are not lazy anymore.

1. It is the fattest and biggest bacon cut.

2. It is adorably sweet and it’s not salty compared to common kinds of bacon.

3. It is pink.

Although this Tocino recipe did not undergo the curing process of nuking it with saltpeter, I succumbed to coloring artificially because I don’t want to use any red powdered spice like paprika because it ruins the flavor.

Let’s dive right away on how to make Tocino for Tosilog. Like what we did with our Tapa, put the marinade on a separate bowl so you can give it a taste before you dunk your meat in.

You can use any meat. If you were thinking of using beef, normal people always use pork. But nobody said you can’t make tocino out of beef… it’s just that nobody ever did make tocino out of beef. With regards to pork, you can use the shoulder part or the ham leg cut or most likely, you will end up with the belly anyway. You will want to have some fat in your tocino cuts because those are the tastiest parts and it shows that you are brave enough to take in cholesterol. Congratulations, you will get fatter you hedonist.

Let’s do the marinade step by step:

Step 1

Boil half a cup of water for every 500 grams of meat and put it in a bowl. Be careful, you don’t want to burn yourself, melt a plastic bowl or break a thin glass bowl. The vase is for flowers.

Step 2.

For every 100 grams of meat, add a tablespoon of sugar, a tablespoon of ketchup, a teaspoon of salt, a teaspoon of powdered pepper, and a few drops of red unicorn tears (see coloring) for magic, in your hot liquid. Stir your liquid until all the powders have joined the water in blessed union.

Step 3

Taste it before you dunk in the pork. You can add more water, more salt, more sugar or more red unicorn tears if you         want to. Magic…

Step 4

For the next 4 hours, let your pork snort all the marinade in the bowl like what they do with their food when they’re             alive. Stick, stack and store them in a reliable freezer. Again, store them in the freezer for up to 3 days and consume them in that duration as well. I am giving you a short time frame for consumption because I do not want you to blame this website if you encounter gastric problems. I did not tell you to pick up stuff on the floor and eat it and I did not mention red unicorn tears.

Step 5

You can cook them anyway you like. You can boil them, fry them, grill them, broil them, you can bury them in your backyard for 24 hours before you dig them out and put them straight into your orifices for all I care just as long as you cook them well done. But just to be safe, shallow-fry them. Do not burn your babies. You want them pink with a little bit of brown smudges.

I assume you have fried your egg and rice for your Tosilog.

If you’ve been itching to know why do we color our Tocino red (and most likely ends up like a glimmering pink seductress),  you can ask Mr. Kitchenero.

How to make Tapa for Tapsilog

How to make Longanisa for Longsilog